This essay is pretty scattered. You begin talking about how storing information is not sustainable then go into the environment and how it is doomed, almost talking about the opposite of what you started with. Also, we’ve learned in this class about living sustainability which I feel has nothing to do with technology. Its about a lifestyle where we live using a minimal amount of resources as possible. How would technology fix this? You could have talked about geo-engineering, but you give not facts or examples of what we can “invent” to do this besides getting rid of land fills to DEVELOP MORE to allow more people to live there. This would not reverse the damage done to the earth (it is not an easy thing or even necessarily possible at this point) it would only makes things worse if we allow more people on this earth. Also, landfills take up a very small percentage of the earth and I feel the thing that is wrong with them is not that we can’t live there. I don’t see how technology is the only way to repair our damage done to the environment. I feel like we need to change the extravagant way we live our lives rather than try and undo it. After saying that technology will save us, you talk about how it has made us lazy, contributes to obesity and will eventually surpass its creators, contradicting your claim that it will improve the earth. Then you start talking about bombs and weapons. I think its hard to follow and I can’t really tell what your thesis is anymore. The organization is confusing and if anything you could have explained the connections clearer. I disagree with some of the things you are saying and the logic doesn’t seem supported. I think if you did some research you could have used it as well as linked it into your essay. There aren’t any ethos, logos, pathos sources which I think we are supposed to have. I’m unsure of the purpose, it seems to be to save the environment rather than the unsustainability of storing information. You don’t have any strength behind your claims which I think is important in your subject matter. I would give your essay a 15 out of 25 using the grading scale. It seems to need some more work. The original topic was interesting but you didn’t talk about it very much.